Saturday, July 23, 2005

I've marked a black X on the calendar today . . .

After months and months of caring for my dad, my mom finally began showing signs of wear. Mysterious back pain that traveled round and round, lots of discomfort, and over the past couple of weeks, that discomfort has turned into agony.

The mystery was solved this weekend. Unable to tolerate the pain anymore, she relented to be taken to the emergency room. Scans there showed what scans just 3 weeks prior hadn't: cancerous lesions on her hips, spine . . .

The doctor said that they were "secondary cancers", probably from the melanoma she had waaay back in the 60s, or maybe from the breast cancer she had in the 80s. He discussed outpatient radiation therapy with us, which seemed promising for a minute.

Then the CAT scans and MRIs came back from her chest xray. It's everywhere, both lungs, just everywhere.

I was with her today when the doctor unceremoniosly told us the results. I had already planned to bring her to my house to live with me for the outpatient radiation. Now I was changing plans on the fly to bring her home with me for whatever time she has left.

We have to wait for the "official" oncology report on Tuesday. The doctor advised me to help her get her affairs in order, get a power of attorney, etc.

I am numb.
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